


Oh my deerest~

by Fizzysquish



Series: Darling Deerest~ [2]
Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Fluff, Multi, Other characters are mentioned and appear but are not the main focus, Reader Insert, Romance, Self Insert, Slow Updates, Sorry!, author uses lots of commas and paragraph breaks, authors a softie, oneshot book, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-05-12 20:57:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19236961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fizzysquish/pseuds/Fizzysquish
Summary: Deerling oneshots book two!Not much has changed from the first book, but the notes page has been updated and hopefully this book wont glitch on me too.Alastor reader insert centered oneshots! Fluff! Drama! Romance! More fluff!Come along with me as I write cute reader insert fics about a powerful demon falling totally in love!All warning (if there are any) will be listed at the beginning of each chapter.(And read some of the first book if you want to!)





	1. Read these Notes!

Howdy ho and welcome to the next book in my Alastor one shots! My names Nicky, or squishy as some people like to call me, and ill be your author! 

 

Before i start this thing tho, lets go over a couple notes and rules about this book. 

 

 

Everything in this book is sfw. There will be no nsfw in this book at all.

There will, however, be a couple heated scenes or one shots occasionally. I don't mind these, and I don't have anything against nsfw work of Alastor, its just that I personally don't care about it and have trouble writing it. 

 

So yeah, heated scenes but no smut or anything. 

 

 

There will be the occasional gorey scene or two, along with some sensitive topics. As I've states before, every chapter will have a list of warnings at the beginning notes if it is needed. Read those top notes and decide whether you'd be okay with the contents or not. 

 

Next id like to mention that when the tag says slow updates, i mean slow updates. I write basically everything from my phone, and i do it all in short bursts. Fics can take me some time to finish. Please be patient! 

 

What exactly does this book include? 

-Fics (oneshots, short and long. Most are roughly a thousand words each depending)

-Headcannons

 

and thats about it, for now at least.

 

Everything i write is cross posted from my wattpad, and if you'd like a possibly more revised/edited fic (spelling errors corrected, italics and bolds) those will be on my wattpad version. This is solely because since im on mobile, i have to use the chrome app to post to ao3, and while its good its still glitchy and revising a fic is much harder on here. 

My wattpad itself is Fizzysquish, as is all my social media usernames. 

 

 

Now, what im sure a good chunk of people wanna ask, do i take requests?-

 

yes, i do.

However, there are rules, and requests are not guaranteed to be a thousand words or more. Most of them are, as i try to be consistent, but there is no promise. Reqs are not my main priority in fic writing, so i can not promise how long it will take me to full full one. 

Or how long it’ll take me to read the request and respond, as, once again, i am on mobile. Best option is to ask on my wattpad oneshot book, or message me on there if you want it seen quickly. 

 

I also reserve the right to say no to a request. I likely wont, as im very chill with them and i enjoy getting them, but i have had to reject a couple before and i still can if i want to. 

 

Now, the rules are as follows:

 

•No nsfw/smut/lemon, at all. Heated/suggestive/lime fic requests are okay but i wont promise to them. 

 

•This is a reader insert/self insert book, so no ocs, sorry. 

 

•Gore, darker themes, and violence is okay, however i will not take anything were reader or Alastor is the one getting seriously hurt. 

 

•Things like the idea of body possession or voodoo are okay, but only for lighthearted circumstances. I will not write anything like these purely for the reader or Alastor to have a malicious intent. 

 

•You can req hcs and a fic with a mental or physical illness or disability. You can req for the darker things like self harm and intrusive thoughts.

I cannot promise that it’ll be perfect, because despite the research i’ll do, if its not something ive experienced I cannot say what is or isnt completely right. 

 

•songfics are okay. 

 

•Angst is okay but i suck at it.

 

•Family relationship reqs are okay, depending on what they are. 

 

•If you wanna req something but aren't sure if its okay, ask and ill let you know. Its a simple yes or no answer. 

 

•Do not rush me for a Fic. Just don't. You ask about its progress or where i’m roughly at with it but do not rush me. 

 

These fics are about a Alastor and reader who are genuinely in love with each other. They genuinely care about one another's well being and adore each other.

Things like full on yandere, abuse, manipulation, etc will not be written about in here. (At least not between the two of them, ever.) 

Once again, if you’re unsure about wether a req will be okay or not, just say what is is and ask. Worse case scenario i say no and possibly explain why. 

 

I also use some of my own hcs for Alastor in these fics, and if you’re curious about those there is a chapter about them in the first book of this series. 

 

 

Alright, i think thats it! Thanks for reading my books friends! 


	2. A sense of Dread

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor and Reader introduce themselves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Req for Abbiepokemon13 on wattpad 
> 
>  
> 
> Alastor and a wolf demon reader, who tends to act like a dog occasionally. They bark at people they hate and at Vaggie for threatening him at all, and can do a few tricks. 
> 
>  
> 
> *cough* I did my best here...
> 
> Warnings for swearing

 

 

 

"Why the fuck are we doing this again?" You narrowed your eyes at the big sign on the huge building before you. Big and tall, clearly meant to house many guests and draw attention to itself from far away. 

 

 

The Happy Hotel, as it was called, was surely a joke. 

 

It had to be. Not that the idea behind it was bad, but because the overall goal was near impossible. It was a cruel, mean spirited joke for everyone. 

 

 

 

"Because, my pup," a clawed hand ruffled your hair, the Deer demon laughing at your annoyed scrunched up face. "While the lovely little princess put on a truly spectacular performance, it would appear that not everyone was convinced of her plan. We!-" Alastor wrapped a arm around you, pulling you into his side in a semi hug. "Are going to change that!" 

 

 

You side eyed him, but nodded and said nothing. He most likely had some strange plan turning in his messed up head, but clearly didn't feel like sharing at the moment. 

 

 

Finally reaching the front door, Alastor turned to you and pushed your cheeks up into a smile. 

"We're about to meet someone new doll, don't forget to smile!" 

 

 

Rolling your eyes, you nodded, plastering on a bright and friendly smile for him. 

It wasn't that you didn't often smile, in fact you did it quite regularly, but meeting someone new was always a...gamble, for you. You tried to be friendly, you really did, but the moment they made any kind of move or threat against Alastor it was like a switch flipped. The wolf in you would come out, and you'd growl and bark and angrily snap at them (in both the literal and verbal ways). 

 

You've gotten better at it over the years, thankfully, were you don't always physically snap and only occasionally bark, though growling was still a big issue. 

 

 

But this was the princess of Hell, and from what you've seen and heard, she seemed to be rather pleasant. Maybe a little too bubbly, but pleasant nonetheless. 

 

 

Satisfied with your friendly grin, Alastor affectionately pat your back, and faced the door. 

 

"Try to stay calm, yes?" 

 

You nodded as he knocked on the door. 

 

A few seconds went by, and then it was swung open, revealing the blonde doll face herself. She stared bug eyed at you two. 

 

 

"Hel-!"

 

 

She slammed the door, waited a second, then creaked it back open. 

 

"-Lo!"

 

 

Aaannnd she slammed it again. 

 

 

You raised a eyebrow, ears twitching as you heard what could only be nervous shouting inside. 

 

 

It took a moment, but eventually the door was creaked back open. She looked sure of herself now, arms crossed and standing tall. 

 

 

"May I speak now?" Your friend asked. 

 

And, right after the doll responded with a "You may.", Alastor was off with you trailing leisurely behind him. 

 

 

"Alastor! Pleasure to be meeting you, sweetheart! Quite a pleasure!" He gripped her hand in a rough but firm handshake, effectively maneuvering around her and into the building. You shook her hand too, but in a more relaxed fashion while she was recovering from Alastor's...sudden-ness, and followed along inside. 

 

 

"Excuse our sudden visit, but I saw your fiasco on the picture show, and I just couldn't resist! What a performance!!

 

 

"Why I haven't been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929!" Your eyes rolled fondly as he laughed, already used to Alastor's morbid humor. He began walking further inside, eyes still on you and the princess. "So many orphans..."

 

 

 

The sound of metal alerted you, and you quickly moved forward as another girl appeared, pointing a spear at his chest. 

 

"Stop right there!" 

 

 

Alastor subtly waved a hand behind his back to you as she muttered something, making you stop in your angry rush towards them. Growling lowly, but stopped. The princess, however, rushed to the other females side. 

 

 

"I know your game," she declared, "and I'm not gonna let you hurt anyone here!

 

 

"You pompous, cheesy, talk show shitlord!" 

 

 

 

Alastor smiled big and wide at her, showing off his rows of razored teeth.

 

 

"My dear, if I wanted to hurt anyone here,"

 

 

Just as Alastor's own form started to change, so did yours. Shifting to all fours, your form was covered in a glitchy shadow, bright eyes and sharp teeth being the only visible piece in color. 

 

You lumbered over to them, becoming a intimidating wall of muscle and darkness at the Radio demons side. 

 

". ̵ . ̶ . ̷ I w ̷ o ̶ u l ̶ d ̶ h̴a v ̶ e ̷ ̶ d ̷ o ̵ n ̵ e ̶ ̵ s ̶ o ̶ ̵ a̴l ̷ r ̶ e ̶ a d̴y̴. ̵ . ̶ . "

 

You both stared down at the demons before you for a few seconds, your forms glitching occasionally to something much more monstrous and bloody. 

 

And then Alastor shook his head, and you shook the shadows off you simultaneously.

 

"No!" Alastor bowed slightly, smile huge and eyes wide. "I'm here because I want to help!" 

 

 

The two bewildered girls shifted their gaze to you, and, tail wagging and still on all fours, you gave them your best smile, showing off your rows of sharpened teeth, form glitching just once to show off the terrifying monster once more. 

 

 

 

 

And suddenly, Charlie and Vaggie were both filled with dread. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayyyyyyye I hope you liked this one, I'll probably end up making a part 2 or something later, because 
> 
> 1-This was actually really fun to write and Ive liked the idea of Alastor and a wolf/dog demon reader for a long time
> 
> And
> 
> 2-I do feel slightly bad that this one isnt really... cute? Idk, I like it a lot and i dont at the same time. I think its just because im so used to writing fluffy stuff now lol
> 
>  
> 
> But yeah, this will most likely have a part two at some point. Thanks for reading!


	3. AdHd hcs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor and reader who has adhd hcs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Requested by kitkatandahalf
> 
>  
> 
> *note- im going off both what reasearch ive done and my own experiences for this, so hopefully its all okay! 
> 
>  
> 
> Also if you'd like to know more about something I've mentioned, let me know! I'll be happy to answer any questions you've got to the best of my ability!

 

•Alastor is surprisingly patient, despite his normally impatient behavior. Its only with you though, most anybody else he has basically no true care or time for.

 

  

•Also actually does a fair bit of research too. Most likely first started doing this once he realized he liked you (*cough* more like helplessly fell in love but whatever-). Thankfully his memory is exceptionally good so he can retain most of it! 

 

 

•Want a stim toy? You get a stim toy, you get aaaaallll the stim toys. Whatever you want, Alastor will very happily get for you. If you feel bad about how much he spends on you, and/or how you can pay him back, he'll most likely just ask for a bunch of kisses and/or cuddles. 

Really he doesn't mind buying them, it makes him happy to see you playing with/using them! As long as you get use out of it, he'll consider it money well spent.

 

 

•Also likes watching you visually/psychically stim. He thinks its neat, and finds a good few of them cute! 

-(Alastor's personal favorite is arm and/or hand flaps, especially when you're happy or excited. He finds it adorable and is glad to see you having fun!) 

 

 

-"Dearest, its twelve have you eaten lunch yet?" 

 

•Pays attention to your eating routine/schedule, since you may forget about it from time to time. He'll remind you, and most likely already has something either planned or prepared so its easier on you. 

 

 

•If you have any auditory processing problems? Well he may get a bit frustrated at first but over time Al will get better at being patient. He's not used to having to repeat himself so it's just gonna take him some time to get used to it. 

 

  

•He read that for some people with adhd, visual info takes 0.1 seconds to process, while auditory info can take 3 to 4 seconds to process, which is why they ask 'what' in response to a question, and then they actually hear the question because their brains only just processed it. So to save time, if you answer his question with a 'what?' He'll just wait for you to answer. If you really didn't hear him however, let him know and he'll easily repeat it for you. 

 

•So it either goes like:

 

 

-Alastor: Do you know what time it is dear? 

 

-Y/n: what? 

 

-Alastor:

 

-Y/n: three forty!

 

 

•Or-

 

 

-Alastor: Do you know what time it is dear? 

 

-Y/n: what? 

 

-Alastor:

 

-Y/n: No really what did you say? 

 

-Alastor: I asked if you knew what time it was my sweet?

 

-Y/n: Oh yeah three forty

 

 

•If you need to remember something, tell him what it is, because Alastor will undoubtedly remember it for you. The 'I'll remember that' adhd demon is evil and visual exhaustion is real, so thank god you have a walking tape recorder with you. 

 

 

•Executive Dysfunction is a b*tch and Alastor does his very best to understand that. Like ive said, he did do research, and though he may not completely understand it he'll do his best to. 

 

 

•In the case of chores, Alastor doesn't mind doing them on his own, but if it makes you feel better he'll do them with you. 

(This can actually be very helpful because while ADHDer's suck at self motivating, due to executive dysfunction, External motivation works just fine. So when we do something for or with someone else, it may be significantly easier than if it was for ourselves!) 

 

 

•Messy room that's actually clean to you because everything's in a specific space and you have a system for it all? That's okay, you guys can figure it out! Alastor prefers a cleaner or more organized area, but he can work with you and try to find a middle ground.

 

 

•Will happily listen to your ramblings, no matter how long. He'll give his input if you want it, but otherwise Alastor is happy to simply listen to you talk for however long you want or need. Will set some water out and cough drops so your throat wont hurt though. 

 

 

•If you like jokes than prepare yourself, because its very likely you two will spend a good hour or so just bouncing silly, cheesy jokes and puns back and forth between eachother like the goofy chedderheads you are. 

 

 

•Honestly hyperfixating is almost dangerous with him as your bf. Alastor wants you to be happy, so if you mention wanting something or talk about your fixation with him he's going to absorb it all like a sponge and spoil you like crazy. You almost get  too much stuff from him! 

 

-(Unless you're living with him at this point, in which case you will literally never run out of room with how big his house is)

 

 

-Y/n: /Bounce leg bounce leg bounce leg-

 

-Alastor: /sets hand on knee

 

-Alastor: /pulls you into his lap

 

-Alastor: /hands you stim toy and kisses your forehead

 

-Alastor:  ♥️

 

 

•Has a weird fascination with watching you hyperfocus on something. It honestly kinda impresses him, watching you work. He'll just sit quietly and watch, not interfering unless it's necessary or you ask him to. 

 

 

•Dissociation kinda... scares him? Well more like highly worries, but either way Alastor just isn't sure how to feel about it. He accepts it as part of you, however may end up basically hovering around you the whole time. He doesn't necessarily mean to, its just what he naturally defaults to when he's worried about you. 

 

 

•A "I dont know" is almost always answered with a "that's alright".

 

 

•Please let him know if you're uncomfortable or overwhelmed in a situation,  please -

 

•This is both for your own sake and his, as Alastor is almost constantly checking on you in silence and if he thinks you're uncomfortable his thought process will instantly go to "Everyone else is mAKING THEM UPSET-" and I'm sure you can imagine what  that may quickly lead to. So, yeah, if your uncomfortable at all please let him know. 

 

 

•Nobody with half a brain tells you rudely to chill, or that you're too intense or annoying, ever. There are some exceptions, namely Charlie, Rosie, and your other close friends, but besides that it's basically hammered into everyones head to be kind to you. 

 

 

•When you do need to be calmed down, however, its okay for someone to say something as long as they're nice about it. Really Alastor doesn't like this rule at all, he'd much rather let you do whatever feels natural, but after you said its okay he's begrudgingly okay with it too. 

 

  

-"Y/n, my dear, could you please calm down a little?" 

 

-"oh, yeah! sure thing!"

 

-"Thank you love  ♥️ "

 

 

Overall Alastor does his best for you, he may not quite understand it all but he's trying.


	4. Good morning my love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: /Kicks in your door
> 
> H EY I HAVE LIKE 12 FIC REQS TO FINSIH AND AND ANOTHER 9 AND 1/2 CHAPTERS TO WRITE ON MY OTHER ALASTOR FIC BUT I FOUND A CUTE AS F*CK PROMPT SO ENJOY THIS WHILE IM BUSY I GUESS
> 
> LOVE YALL!!
> 
>  
> 
> Prompt- "I can't get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name and now your having breakfast in my sweater."
> 
>  
> 
> Sorta implied morning after? I guess? Idk man this is pure morning fluff  
> Switching pov, but mostly written in 2nd and 3rd pov  
> This isnt long but i'm extremely happy with it so i hope you guys like it too!

 

 

Waking up next Alastor seemed like something out of a fairy tale.

 

 

That sounded cliche as hell, but it was honestly the closest thing you could think to compare it to. Everything was warm and, surprisingly, soft, like you were sunbathing on a cloud. The covers were soft and the pillows were plush, and there was a warm body pressed directly against your own, arms wrapped around your waist and a nose nuzzled in your hair. It was incredibly comfortable, to say the least.

 

A tiny slice of heaven that you never wanted to leave.

 

But a rumble of your stomach and the dull ache of hunger does eventually push you to shimmy out of your little nest and begin searching for something to wear. You debate putting on what you wore yesterday, but a quick glance in Alastor's closet and you throw that idea out the window in exchange for a soft sweater instead. You still have wear your shorts on, but the sweater is comfy and warm and smells like Alastor so you call it good and head towards the kitchen, mind already thinking of what to make.

 

 

***

 

 

The lack of body warmth next him is what first wakes the deer demon. Alastor's clawed hand feels around, a rare, semi frownish-like smile twists his mouth once he cant find anything other than sheets and pillows. He cracks open one eye, tiredly scanning over the area around him.

 

You aren't here.

 

But, you are in the house still, he's sure of that at least. His shadows would’ve alerted him if you weren’t.

 

Alastor takes his time getting up, deciding theres no rush as long as you're still nearby. Plus, under the covers is still warmer than out of them, even without you next to him.

 

And then he hears the whistle of a kettle and smells something like bacon, and that of course causes his ears and nose to twitch enough to were Alastor eventually hauls himself up and out of bed without much thought.

 

 

***

 

 

You're flipping pancakes and humming to yourself when two arms wrap back around your waist once again, Alastor resting his chin on your head.

 

"Good morning Alastor~"

 

He hums, squeezing you momentarily. "Good morning my dear~"

 

You smiled, one hand coming down the pat his own. "There's coffee in the kettle if you would like any, food should be done soon too." The deer hums again, moving to kiss your cheek and murmur something unintelligible about you being too perfect for him, before pulling away to fill a mug with the dark liquid.

 

You can hear him shuffling around as you finish another pancake, adding it to the stack on the plate next to you. Theres only a bit of batter left, so you use it to quickly make little flapjacks that you can feed to the Alligators later, remembering how happy Marty and Phillip had seemed the last time you made them some too.

 

Alastor is watching you, you can feel it, so once you've finished and turned off the stove you turn your attention to him, stacking the little flapjacks on a separate plate.

 

"What's up fluffy ears?"

 

He tilts his head, eyes narrowing in confusion. "Fluffy ears?"

 

You nod you're head, picking up the plate stacked with pancakes and the bacon and heading over to the kitchen table, Alastor following behind you.

 

"Yeah, you're ears are all fluffy before you brush them-"

 

 

"Oh?"

 

 

"It's cute."

 

 

"Oh..."

 

 

You chuckle, grinning at him when his cheeks redden slightly. That happened often when you said something like that, and it was adorable as hell every time.

 

Setting the table, you couldn’t help but admire your own work laid out before you. Pancakes, bacon, coffee, toast, you’re rather pleased with it all. And, judging by the way Alastor happily munches on a piece of bacon he snatched from your plate, you’d say he quite likes it too.

 

 

***

 

 

Alastor stares at you as you eat, pancake slice still on his fork after three minutes but making no move to eat it. He’s still hungry, and does wanna eat still... but the deer’s kinda too distracted to at the moment.

 

He’s watching you, butterflies in his stomach and heart warm as you eat your food and drink your coffee, unable to turn away. There’s a stupidly soft smile on his face, he knows it, but Alastor doesn’t care too much about it around you.

 

“It’s strange,” he says eventually, affection bubbling inside his stomach as you instantly direct your attention on him.

 

"I can't seem to get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name, and now your having breakfast in my sweater...”

 

Alastor flushes a bit when you tilt your head curiously at him, a lovely warm smile of your own on that gorgeous face of yours.

 

“It’s...” he struggles, “It’s just so..” 

 

A giggle from you cuts him off, and Alastor melts inside as you reach a hand across the table to offer your hand, quickly gripping it with his own.

 

 

“I love you, Alastor ♥️”

 

 

 

“I love you too Y/n ♥️”


	5. Bloody petals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request for Luna_The_Eliatrope2 on wattpad
> 
>  
> 
> 'Sick deer reader, with heavy ass anime sickness'
> 
> I uh...took this in the form of hanahaki disease...so...  
> (Also i may of...forgotten about the deer part? A little bit? Sorry...)
> 
> Written in 2nd/3rd person, has some time skips but all are mostly small
> 
> Warnings for blood, vomiting (flowers but still adding just in case), angst, and death
> 
>  
> 
> (Angst with a happy ending)

 

 

**It burned.**

 

 

Acacia blossoms and blood fell out of your mouth, your chest and throat burning from hacking them all up.

 

You stared at the flowers in your palms, tears welling up and a shuddering sigh escaping you.

 

 

Its been four months since this started. Since you woke up hacking daffodils and blood clots and began scratching at your burning throat.

 

Since you realized you were in love.

 

"It's impossible," you had told yourself. "I'm lucky enough to be considered a 'friend' to him."

 

And then you died three weeks later.

 

 

***

 

 

How many times have you died now? Surely it was past twenty, with how many times you've opened your eyes and watched as you plummeted to the hellish ground.

 

Like right now.

 

Hell was actually quite a beautiful place, if you looked at it from up here in the sky. It was full of reds and pinks and the occasional yellow or green, and one some rare times a speck of blue or purple. Twinkling lights and bright neon signs lit it up like vegas at night time.

 

Or maybe you were just being soft and trying to make yourself happy again.

 

It didn't matter.

 

What was important right now was to focus on getting back to the hotel without anyone noticing, and thinking of pretty cities and vegas lights wasn't going to help.

 

Your feet hit the pavement without a sound, your legs already moving you through dark alleyways back towards home. Hopefully no one will have noticed your absence, though considering it was almost midday by now that was doubtful. Charlie was always checking up on her residents and guests, and it was likely that she'd of noticed you were gone by now.

 

( ~~ _And Alastor would be wondering were his friend was_~~.)

 

You stopped, vomiting pink camellias onto the pavement before wiping your mouth and continuing on.

Being in love sucked.

 

 

***

 

 

Sitting in Charlie's office chair, you were suddenly reminded of being sent to the principles office in middle school.

 

 

You shifted uncomfortably.

 

"-you didnt leave a note or a text or anything! Do you have any idea how worried we all were!?"

 

"Vaggie-"

 

 

"No, Charlie, not this time! This is the fourth  time this month!" The angry demon pointed at you, eye full of rage. "You've been disappearing without a word for months now, only to suddenly show up hours later looking tired and sad and i've had enough of it! Whatever's going on, Y/n, you better start talking, _right now_!"

 

 

You throat scratched.

 

"I cant."

 

 

"BULLSHIT!" Vaggie's hair bow resembled devil horns and her voice rumbled with fury. The room shook, and for a moment you feared a second death. But Vaggie was your friend, and truly you knew she would never intentionally harm you, no matter how angry she became.

She cared about you. She wanted to protect you.

 

And that's exactly why you couldn't tell her.

 

 

"I can't, I'm sorry."

 

 

She screamed.

 

 

 

***

 

 

Another half hour of being screamed at, and you were finally able to walk out the office with a sinking heart. It hurt to be yelled like that, even if you knew she only did it out of protective frustration. She'd apologize later.

 

But it still hurt.

 

 

"Are you alright, my dear?"

 

 

You didn't turn to look at him, instead staring intently at your feet and trying to force back a sob.

 

 

Your head pounded.

Your lungs were burning.

 

 

"I'm-" you paused as your voice cracked, clearing it to try again. "I'm fine."

 

Footsteps came up in front of you, the deer demon leaning down to meet your eyes. "Lying doesn't suit you Y/n."

 

 

~~_It hurt_~~.

 

 

"I'm fine, Alastor."

 

 

His ear flicked, staring at you.

 

You felt the petals coming

 

 

"I need to go-"

 

 

The tall demon stepped in time with you, mirroring your movements to block you. He wasn't happy with being dismissed, you knew that. But the need to cough was becoming unbearable.

 

"Alastor," your voice came out like a croak " _Please_ -"

 

 

Your heart was breaking.

 

 

Alastor reached out to touch you, and it snapped.

 

 

You fell forward, hacking up gardenias and blood and sobbing crocodile tears. The red demon caught you, claws curling into your sides as you both sunk down to the floor, pulling you into his chest and staring at you. Distantly you heard a door open and large gasps, but you couldn't open your eyes to register who it was.

 

You heard other things as well, something like shouting and slamming, but everything was muffled like you were underwater.

 

 

You couldn't breath.

 

 

 

Careful hands cupped your face and turned it upwards, thumbs rubbing up and down your cheeks soothingly. A kiss was pressed to your forehead.

 

"I'll find you when you come down, dear."

 

 

You died for the second time that day.

 

 

***

 

 

The pentagram was lovely this high up.

 

 

***

 

 

Alastor was there when you landed, standing straight and smiling warmly. It made your heart warm and your gut flip.

 

 

"Welcome back my dear," he pulled you into a hug, arms wrapping around you and head going to your shoulder and you felt the petals itch once again.

 

 

( _ ~~He doesn't love you~~_.)

 

 

It was silent for awhile, almost peaceful if not for your pain, until Alastor's grip tightened and he lifted his face to stare at you, directly at you.

 

 

"Y/n, do you love me?"

 

 

( ~~ _Yes_~~ )

 

 

"What makes you say that twizz?"

 

 

He was silent for awhile, before sighing and leaning to press his forehead against your own. His eyes were sad, something you've never seen nor thought possible from him.

 

"Your'e sick," Alastor sighed, "and it's my fault, isn't it?"

 

"No, no no no," you teared up, heart aching. "No, Al, no, it's not your fault, not in the slightest, it's just me and my stupid feelings and-"

 

"They are not stupid, Y/n!" He snapped, hands coming to hold your face. His thumbs rubbed against your cheeks, up and down, up and down...

 

 

"I wish," he growled, staring into your eyes with his own and looking oh so desperate, "I wish I had told you. Before this, before you-" he trailed off, taking a breath. Your hands pressed against his chest, curling into fists as you fought off another coughing fit.

 

 

"I love you Y/n."

 

 

You froze.

 

 

"What?"

 

 

"I love you."

 

Your mouth was suddenly dry, but the need to cough wasn't as bad. "Your'e not- you're not just saying that to make me feel better, are you?"

 

"No," his thumbs were still rubbing your cheeks, up and down, up and down...

 

"I'm sorry, Y/n, that you had to suffer so long because I couldn't say it."

 

The cough was gone, the petals and flowers in your lungs disappearing as you licked your lips and felt your heart thundering away in your chest. "Maybe," you stammered, "maybe you can make it up to me."

 

Alastor laughed, and it brought peace through your heart and warmth through your veins, and finally, _finally_ , you could breath.

 

 

When Alastor kissed you, you thought of the pentagram from the sky and thought it was nothing in comparison to this.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Acacia blossoms- Concealed Love
> 
> pink camellias- longing for you
> 
> Daffodils- unrequited love
> 
> gardenias- secret love
> 
>  
> 
> This fic was...really angsty and im sorry cause thats probs not what you were expecting, but i hope you like it anyways! 


End file.
